Journal Entry: Thu Jul 26, 2012, 7:04 PM
No one reads this or cares and I haven't put up any art in ages anyways, but it feels nice to just write something and leave it for anyone to see, even if it's a rant or nonsense.
I want to stop taking life and others seriously, but for some reason people seem to love making that very difficult. They like to make me angry, to get on my nerves. I do what i can to keep my cool, to just shrug it off or counter with something witty or mind-numbingly bad humor. However, what I really want is to just kill them. Or otherwise permanently remove them from interacting with me. I wonder if they, especially him, really want to make me so... absolutely livid, or if they just don't understand how much the things they say or do make me want to bash their skull in or cut them to ribbons.
I'm glad I have some self control, and some ways to release pent up anger and relax. But want I need is to just not fucking care anymore. That would be much more delightful and less troublesome, so I could think and worry about things that are more important. I need this vacation. I need to be out in the woods with no one around, and just exist without all this bothersome drama and what-not. I want to get my kayak so I can go to the most remote little spots I can find, so I can have some precious time away from people.
I want to move forward. There are so many things I need and want to improve on.
17 days and I can breath real forest air again for a week, and not hear cars off in the distance or smell the various unpleasantries of civilization. I can hardly wait <3
Listening to: Distance - Headstrung
Playing: Starcraft 2
Drinking: Mountain Dew